And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
