I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
