The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
