Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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