I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
