Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
