The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
