Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
that may or may not have been my penis.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
