You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
