you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
