Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
