Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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