We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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