So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
where are my eyebrows?
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
