I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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