hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize