just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I deserve this hangover.
Randomize
