My nipple is on Facebook.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize