So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
