Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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