no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize