I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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