i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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