I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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