I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
kristin has been a bad kristin
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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