I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
pray to the hookup gods
Randomize
