You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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