We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
