I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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