I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
