4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I wish they made helmets for livers.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
