Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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