ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
