And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
