Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
