Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
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I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
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Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
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