he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
