hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize
