We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
