thus making me awesome and them whores
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
