He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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