he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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