How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Randomize
