just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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