scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
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