he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
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It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
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The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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