Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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