babies were throwing up all over the place
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
