Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I need a hoe opinion
go on
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
