dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Pappa wants mamma naked
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize