i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
