dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
